Saturday, April 28, 2012

Marvel's The Avengers

I saw it. Here's what I think.

(Some spoilers after the jump. )

Good lawrd, the actors in this movie are hot. I never paid much attention to Chris Hemsworth before The Avengers. I haven't seen him as Thor. But my trained eye says Chris Hemsworth looks like Brad Pitt's buff football player brother. They look disturbingly alike. Is the accent for real?  Hot, hot, hot.

Thor obviously did not get Edna's memo about the cape. 
Not surprisingly, I also found Mark Ruffalo interesting. Him or his character, Bruce Banner. I am drawn to unassuming geniuses who turn into uncontrollable green monsters. The graying hair helps.

Will you marry me, Bruce?

And then, there's Scarlett Johansson who plays Natasha Romanoff/the Black Widow. No explanations needed here. Have you seen this woman? Even sitting down, she's hot.

Incidentally, I like her hair better here than in the Ironman series. I am inspired.

Here's the movie's story in a nutshell: Humans discover the Tessaract, a cube that provides unlimited energy, and try to harness its power to develop weapons of mass destruction (for when aliens decide to invade the Earth again). Thor's brother, Loki, steals the Tessaract. He uses it to open a portal that will bring an army of aliens into Earth. S.H.I.E.L.D, via Nick Fury, puts together a team of superheroes, a demi-god, and a couple of assassins to stop Loki. The team is called the Avengers. They succeed in the end. Bow.

Of course we've heard of this story before. In Transformers III, the Deceptions steal a cube that provides unlimited energy and use it to open a portal that will bring an army of aliens into Earth. Except in the Transformers, the cube is called the All Spark and the team that stops the invasion from happening is composed of aliens (the Autobots) and some humans. Yawn.

The Tessaract and/or All Spark
Anyway, we won't be watching The Avengers for the emotional breadth and depth of the story so I guess that will do. Pao didn't mind. He says the fight scenes rock.

On a side note, I cannot get over Cobie Smulders (Robin of How I Met Your Mother fame) as agent Maria Hill. She's distracting. I fear she will suffer the same fate as Joey Tribianni, este, Matt Le Blanc.

Even in her supposedly most moving moments, I laugh. 

The Avengers is really all about Tony Spark/Ironman. That's fine by me because I'm beginning to think Tony Spark is my favorite superhero of all time. He's cocky and smug, but here he discovers that he's actually capable of acting for a higher purpose. In the end, it is Tony Spark that will be the hero among the heroes.

And oh, yes, Robert Downey Jr. is hotz too.

You've been repulsored.

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